‘Zoom betting shops’ best way out of poverty – bookmaker says

Bookmaker insists new 'betting shops' hosted on Zoom are the future.

Director of Communications, Keith Vim said: “Our Zoom betting shops are great for anyone missing human contact and even handier for us with no overheads to pay.

“At ten pounds entry fee, they’re the best way out of a shit time in quarantine and poverty.

“Our staff can scowl at you or accuse you of stealing the Racing Post from the comfort of your own living room.

“Anyone with a special odour function on their webcam, can get the authentic betting shop experience as we release whiffs of urine to your desktop.

“However, anyone who wins a bet will be disconnected and banned.

• Man learns violin and 6 languages since betting shops shut

“Give us a call when your Self Employed Income Support Scheme cheque comes through.”

Punter Gareth Timms, who tried out the Zoom betting experience, said: “I never realised how much I hated betting shop punters until now - so I banned myself.

You Might Like

Horse bored sh*tless in lockdown

“Virtual Grand National FIXED” says man who had £1 on every runner

Ricky Tibbs Website – The Professional Layabout