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Smocks for plebs in new racecourse dress code

Leonard Collins

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New stringent dress codes force plebs to dress as agricultural workers when attending UK racecourses.

Race goers with no private education or owners’ badge will wear smocks and sandals when attending UK race courses.

The fashion think tank ‘Kits Off’ has come up with the solution after racing fans turned up to the races dressed in any old rubbish.

Shelley Craps, Kits Off event’s organiser said: "Putting the right clothes on is hard for people who aren’t as middle class as us.

"For hundreds of years we've trusted them to do their own flies up to the races but let's be honest, it hasn't worked. So, we may as well enforce the peasant agricultural worker chic."

Hair and Wigs

While the Middle Ages aren’t many people’s first choice for a new hair style, a selection of second hand wigs will be available to rent alongside a massively overpriced race programme book.

 

 Plebs will wear smocks and sandals at all UK racecourses

How race goers will dress next year

 

“A Richard II bob has been popular with pleb men in our trials, and can be rented for just £165 for the day.”

“They all have anti-theft ink tags under the head so don’t even try to walk out the course with them on,” said Craps.

Keith Vim, chief steward at Ascot said: “Anyone who turns up at our gates who has forgotten how to dress can wear socks and pants.

“We don’t have any lockers so leave your non-regulation clothes 6 miles down the road – by the pie shop bins.”

Race goer Gareth Timms said: “I get to wear my normal clothes to the track?

"F*cking brilliant!”

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