Connect with us

Bookmakers

Bookmakers face €20 fines for ‘made up gambles’

Desdemona Phelps

Published

on

bookmakers who indulge in ‘made-up’ gambles will get a €20 fine and told to ‘stop it’

Punishment for bookmakers' made up gambles is now €20 fine and a telling off

Bookmakers pretending that horses are being backed will now get a hefty fine and a telling off.

The gambling watchdog says it will get tough on make-believe reports of horses being ‘backed’ or ‘working well’ by dishing out a €20 fine and a stiff talking to.

Bookmaker Keith Vim said: “So called 'gambles’ earn us a fortune. You only have to utter the words '7-4 to 13-8' and telephone lines explode.

“Without them I couldn’t drive a Bentley, send my kids to private school, or even have bought this gold toilet.

“These monster fines should make us behave, but, we will do f*ck all if everyone wants our cash.”

Gambling watchdog spokeswoman Shelley Craps said: “In addition to the fine, bookmakers flouting the new rule will have a letter from us telling them to stop it.

“However, our six-figure salaries, mortgages and colossal pensions depend on your lost cash - so, as you were.”

Spotting the Signs

The betting watchdog issued a Safety Pamphlet with all the signs to watch out for in case a full-of-shit bookmaker is trying it on.

Phrases:
  • “He’s the one everyone wants to be on”
  • “Well backed”
  •  “Good money for…”
  • “working well”
Practical Advice
  • Run a mile from anyone wearing a betting costume (pom pom hats or bookmaker puffer jackets) telling you, ‘all the money has come for this one’

Don't Miss

Racing pundits’ ‘Dawn Chorus’ of utter bullsh*t draws big crowds
Six Signs you’re in a Toxic Relationship – with your Bookmaker
Advertisement
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Most Popular

Copyright © The Scutter 2020 All Rights Reserved