Losing punter blows up betting shop toilet

Gravesend bookies blown to ‘smithereens’ after loser backs tailed off last second favourite then lobs hand grenade in sh*tter.

There are few things more infuriating than losing all your cash on dodgy beaten favourites to pay bookmakers, racing authorities or horse racing presenters’ their eye-watering salaries.

While we fall for the same old rubbish (“this one’s being backed”, “the money’s come for this one” or “it’s the one everyone wants to be on”), this is where the anger stops for most people.

However, after backing tailed-off last 2-1 second favourite Jimmy Jumpsuit in a novice hurdle, Kent-based gambler Gareth Timms took his rage to the next level.

Unemployed Timms, 31 from Gravesend, annihilated his local betting shop by chucking a fragmentation grenade into a Mugbet betting shop toilet.

(Above) A typical betting shop toilet

Angry Timms told the Scutter: “Betting shop toilets are some of the most disgusting, foulest places on earth; I was doing them a favour.

“The original plan was to graffiti the toilet door in Sharpie. You know, write something like: “Keith’s a c**t’, ‘f*ck you Keith’, ‘c**t Keith’, ‘W*nker Keith’ – there was so much I wanted to say, I hadn’t quite decided.

“But, after four tailed off second favourites I got a bit angry and blew that shitole to smithereens. It smelled like a dead cat in there anyway.”

While the explosion turned the shop to dust, nobody – other than manager Keith Vim who suffered minor burns after trying to save his FOBTs and SSBTs – was seriously injured.

Mushroom Cloud

Mavis Cartwright living opposite the betting shop told police she saw a mushroom cloud of smoke, then heard a loud boom that broke a window and blew betting slips into her lounge.

“Why are these sad losers are always attacking betting shops?  How embarrassing that the racing industry is so desperate for cash that they have to arrange for second favourites to finish last – they’ve ruined my front room!”

Although firefighters battled all night to extinguish the blaze, they were unable to save the betting emporium on High Street, Gravesend.

Fireman, Dik Venom said: “We were called out to the blaze in the late hours of the evening after reports of a man blowing up the shitter.

“If they don’t stop conning everyone with these rubbish offers and beaten favourites, one day someone will get hurt.”

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