Horse says jockey ‘full of sh*t’ after rider claims swerving into rivals was ‘horse’s fault’. Racehorse Jimmy Jumpsuit has hit...
Plan to replace whip with kazoos thwarted as horses lose their sh*t. Horses have scuppered the latest incentive to replace whips with air horn canisters, kazoos...
Bookmaker prime suspect in popping WW2 grenade into feeding trough that blew up stable when horse went for 6pm evening sh*t. There are few horses luckier...
Stallion wanting some shut eye tells yard tour visitors to ‘piss off’ Leading sire Jimmy Jumpsuit told a guided tour "F*ck off the lot of...
Horse so bored in coronavirus lockdown he'd even consider trying to win race. “At this moment,” 5 year-old bay gelding Jimmy Jumpsuit says, “I’d actually consider...
Horse livid with jockey after pair win race they should have thrown Jockey Alf Archer was criticised by his horse for winning a race. Having ignored...
Eight year-old chaser with 160+ IQ horse equivalent of Rain Man The exclusive Mensa society confirmed race horse Jimmy Jumpsuit is now among the world’s cleverest...
Horses can now run at Mac 1.6 thanks to reinforced steel headgear that 'gees' them up with Thrash Metal Scientists have created new headgear that can...
"Racegoers throwing up and taking their clothes off; trainers threatening us with the sack if we lose and jockeys making daft noises during a race -...
A depressed thoroughbred racehorse is making his trainer question his future position. Gareth Beak asked himself the question whether there’s any point carrying on as a...
Gravesend betting shop blown to ‘smithereens’ after punter loses cash then lobs hand grenade into toilet After backing the tailed-off...
Revenue loss couldn’t come at worse time says betting chief whose home improvements cost an absolute bomb. Mugbet’s Chief Executive,...
Awkward b*stard calls 7 false starts. Racing at Scutter Park wouldn’t be the same without the horses and riders taking...
Gravesend bookie uses Goliath betting slips to craft snazzy COVID face mask. With face coverings compulsory for England’s shoppers as...
Bookies ban punter stealing midweek football coupons to use as toilet roll substitute Costco Warehouse Operative, Gareth Timms knows a...
Trainer facing 10-year ban but protests innocence blaming horse’s addiction to pickled onion-flavoured snacks. Trainer Alf Archer has blasted corruption...
PR representative tells punters to bet on cherry-picked runners with flu, ringworm and foot-bruises. Instead of peddling his daily tripe,...
‘DB Cooper cleaned up at Sittingbourne dogs so I pushed him out of plane’, says bookmaker. The 45-year-old mystery of...
Calls to reclassify bookmakers as new species after research shows layers share 97% DNA with FRILLED LIZARDS. New research shows...
Bookmakers praise ‘indestructible’ FOBTs after protestors accidentally blow up betting shop with rocket launcher Betting giant Mugbet breathed a sigh...