Gravesend bookie uses Goliath betting slips to craft snazzy COVID face mask. With face coverings compulsory for England’s shoppers as...
‘DB Cooper cleaned up at Sittingbourne dogs so I pushed him out of plane’, says bookmaker. The 45-year-old mystery of DB Cooper may now be solved...
Bookmakers need reclassifying as new species after latest research shows layers share 97% of their genetic material with FRILLED LIZARDS. Frilled lizards are bookmakers’ closest living...
Spooks praise bookmakers who know about every horse in every yard before anyone else Intelligence officers have praised bookmakers for training them in the shady arts...
Rozzers nab bookie cramming punters into wooden dog shed. Bookmaker Keith Vim has been arrested after using his dog’s kennel as an unlicensed betting office. Vim,...
Social distance fanatics applaud germ-dodging bookie who disinfects punters with Dettol and bleach The sight of ‘2 metre’ floor markers, hand sanitizers and trolley wipes in...
Pensioner receives good duffing up for winning £21.50 Betting giant Mugbet sent henchmen round to a pensioner's home address after he won £21.50 on a bet....
Every bookmaker will be annihilated if well-backed horse wins, says PR representative Renowned sh*t chatter Sarah Tonin, Mugbet’s Media Relations Representative, told TV viewers on the...
Study shows bookmakers are humanoid race composed of liquid mercury and non-terrestrial ‘alien metals’. New research has found that bookmakers are an advanced, extra-terrestrial, humanoid...
Bookie breaks restraining order by targeting problem gambler from garden shed. Bookmaker Keith Vim broke a restraining order after spending 10 days hiding in a self-excluded...
Gravesend bookies blown to ‘smithereens’ after loser backs tailed off last second favourite then lobs hand grenade in sh*tter. There...
Revenue loss couldn’t come at worse time says betting chief whose home improvements cost an absolute bomb. Mugbet’s Chief Executive,...
Insiders confirm North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un fell into a coma moments after Seamus Heffernan’s Super Sunday 5000/1 Naas...
Awkward b*stard outdoes himself calling 7 false starts in 2-mile hurdle. Racing at Scutter Park wouldn’t be the same without...
Man who told betting shop he won millions on photo finishes with psychic abilities, definitely full of sh*t. Unemployed betting...
New rules mean only bellends can apply for jobs as stewards. Stewards at Scutter Park are the first racecourse in...
Gravesend betting shop pelted with cow pats then burned to the ground by vegan protestoers after ‘Free hamburger with every bet’ giveaway...
Bookies ban punter stealing betting slips to use as toilet roll substitute Costco Warehouse Operative, Gareth Timms knows a good...
Legendary city of Atlantis housed beautiful racecourse where all favs won, so bookmakers blew it up to make way for...
Failed dope test reveals horse’s addiction to pickled onion-flavoured snacks Trainer Alf Archer has been charged by Scutter Park stewards...