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New ‘Bet-Less’ lets punters lose without gambling

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New betting service removes suffering, hassle and torment from losing money.

‘Bet-Less’, allows punters to lose money without ever placing a bet.

Paying a lump sum annually or a monthly direct debit to their bookmaker, bettors can still lose, but, don’t have to go through the rigmarole of placing a bet.

Bet-Less allows punters to simply donate money to a bookmaker without ever having a bet
Bet-Less allows punters to simply donate money to a bookmaker without ever having a bet

Dik Venom from Mugbet said: “This is a brilliant idea because this way, we don’t have to speak to the bastards.”

“If you lose £3,000 a year, for example, our ‘Bet-Less’ algorithm might suggest a contribution of £2,200 – to us. That’s saving you a whopping £800 and loads more in not smashing up TVs.”

“The anger of a photo finish going the wrong way, getting 6th place when you backed each-way at 5-places, or backing a second favourite that finished last at Chelmsford – they’ll all be gone.”

Serial losers can have all the hassle removed from their lives and still lose.
Serial losers can have all the hassle removed from their lives and still lose.

“There’s no need to feel guilty, you are still paying the wages of all the jockeys, trainers and regulators who are on our books. For once, we’re definitely on your side.”

Punter Gareth Timms said: “It’s like losing as normal, but without the ‘betting’ part.

“It’s f*cking brilliant!”

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